Thursday, June 09, 2005

These Hands: poetry by kim

These hands have been in motion from the moment I was conceived.

These hands were the cilia that helped me figure out my world as a small child.

These hands, though asian are no different than my white sisters, my black brothers, my indian friends.

The phalanges that extend from the wrists of this being have learned to color with crayons, write with a pencil, do cursive in permanent ink.

They have held my body in midair as I learned to do cartwheels.

They have gracefully interpreted the emotions of a classical ballet piece.

They have gripped a tennis racquet, with sweat in between the leather and my epidermis, while running around on a court in hundred degree weather.

These hands have had my fingers jammed from 'setting' the volley ball for my fellow players.

These hands have created many a artistic projects for my family and friends on special and non-special occasions.

These long, somewhat slender fingers have dreamed of being a concert pianist while playing the ever challenging musical piece 'chop sticks'.

My hands have held the very hands of my husband from day one to the present, every day.

My hands are the tools in which I have learned many skills that employed me, have given me joy, have gotten me in trouble, have covered my mouth in a frozen surprise, have waved hello and goodbye to many loved ones through the years.

These hands with many miles on them are still young in years, and yet with so much life in them still, that I need not be surprised by what they will do for me next.

These hands have so desired, along with my heart, to embrace a lost child, an orphaned child, a sickly child, my own child,

So as the years have come and gone, these hands, my hands have allowed me to comfort the hurting, celebrate with a loved one, hugged a homeless person, clapped at a child's accomplishment or silliness, caressed the face of a newborn baby, and spoken another language through signing.

These hands, my hands have given little, have taken much and seek more ways to be used in the life of others.

These hands that have been so carefully and wonderfully made perfect, as well asfunctional, await for the abundance of new work, more sorrow, always ready to get dirty, waiting for a future of continued purpose.

Thank you, god, for these hands...

Book: Mountains Beyond Mountains - by tracy kidder

The life and work of Paul Farmer. Between the pages I am currently reading, I am thoroughly enjoying each word, each paragraph. I want so much not to finish the book because I don't want this hero's story to end.

When I look back on the last few years and see the progression in which god has been taking me through the spiritual, the physical, the emotional, the relational and finally the passion-filled ride of my life, I am filled with a sense of gratitude. This is not to say that I have any one thing down firmly, but that in the search for my life's work, my life's purpose I have been able to see the slow development of where I may be heading. I have some grandiose ideas for sure, but if I am patient enough I will know in greater detail of what I will be soon working toward for the future.

I have been smart enough to have kept my eyes open and my heart ready for anything, in case something should spectacularly great happen for me. So far nothing on that level, but I have seen all the pieces beginning to make sense and begin processing the images of what are some of my passions.

• Compassion and empathy for the underdog.
• Compassion and sadness, empathy and a great desire to work on the plight of our children, our future.
• Anger, hate and madness over poverty, war, homelessness, disease, and women's issues.
• Sadness, frustration, anger of the working conditions, the pay and the treatment of migrant workers across the world.
• A sickened heart that slavery has never truly been abolished. It's quite rampant worldwide-but it's overlooked by all the other ills of society.

When reading such a book as Mountains Beyond Mountains, one realizes the power that we each have within to do something, as long as we have enough guts, timidity, anger, and courage to try to make changes as we encounter them.
I have for years felt a sense of that power, but now more than ever, I am beginning to develop the courage and the guts to be the change that I want to see.

I realize that I can never be like Paul Farmer in that I can just make things happen from the get-go, but now understand that I don't HAVE to be the one that is the creative force behind my social endeavors, but that I can partner with others that have the same passion and are implementing these things already. And as for myself it may simply be a matter of finding a way to use my gifts that may best fit the work of the affiliate(s).

I have always held myself in very high esteem in terms of expecting great things from myself, from being the creative, to pulling it off to receiving the glorification of my sweat equity. Basically it had to be all or nothing otherwise I wasn't going to get involved in any way. I had always felt that I could die knowing that I didn't need to lean on anyone else to accomplish what I desired. But somewhere down the road, with little to show for having such high self expectations, I realized that I can't throw the baby out with the bath-water, just because I wasn't the one to draw the bath. I believe this is a mark of maturity, of self-realization of my powerlessness, my need to no longer be in control and to not get due credit where credit is due.

I only wish I had accepted all of this much sooner in life, but then perhaps it has needed my taking this long to finally 'get it'.

I still desire to be some one great but only in the idea that I am able to help one, two, three or more children in some form that is outside of myself. Perhaps great in the sense of knowing I was being used fully for who I was created to be in this life.

I still will never be a Paul Farmer, but I certainly can piggyback on his immense desire for change in the lives of the poor, the children, the women, the sick and the dying.

Thanks, Paul Farmer, for your inspiration and for your true example of what humanitarian work really looks like. I will forever be grateful for your legacy and simply your living by example.

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

The Glory of A Returned Journey : poetry by kim

The hills beyond the grassland whispers of things to come, to see and enjoy.

Walking knee deep in the golden thresh, of the sway, of the grass brings to mind the journey one must take to reach the next moment of exhilaration.

The air is stale making the lungs work greater for deeper breaths.

The humidity of the day does not let on that it will reprieve itself from the cloudy sky.

Reaching deep within the confines of this biological, skeletal being, the muscles work to move every joint, every member in a rhythmic cadence.

The quiet crushing of grass underfoot is a reminder that it's an intruder wandering this land of ancestors.

The surroundings are lush and green.

There are vast pockets of water that seem almost frozen with movement.

The air is foreign to this being, this intruder, who continues on its way to the next new moment.

There seems to be a noisy quietness that overwhelms the grassland, as it supports the hills from below.

The grassland teems with a great amount of life, wild, free, and unpretentious to its friends the hills.

The hills themselves seem to speak of a more quiet air that even dare say seems more sacred, more holy.

As each footing moves forward in direction, the ears are open, the heart is beating quickly, the mind works to recall perhaps a hint of familiarity, and the eyes are simply overwhelmed.

The aroma of this land is pungent, foreign, repulsive, yet welcoming to this intruder.

Just beyond the grassland and these hills bounds a more rambunctious bit of life beyond the horizon of this land.

The whizzing of motor bikes, the smells of fresh dishes, the chatter of a people selling their goods, street-side.

The noise is most overwhelming and constant but speaks of the goings on of a people in perpetual motion.

There are delicacies to be had, fresh from a boiling pot, there are trinkets made by hand, and drinks to be shared with another.

The sites and sounds only begin to subside as the day slowly draws to dusk, but the remnants of the days activities are still fresh in one's mind.

You'd think with all the noise of the township, that it would clearly echo its voice loudly and clearly to the quiet of the grasslands and hills, but neither knows of the other except by way of the traveling beings from one place to the other. Only to speak of such things when the other is not near.

This intruder prefers the quiet of the farmland, while its adventurous side looks forward to another day in the land of the masses. But only to return to the grassy lands where the vast pools of water, that mirror the hills from beyond, as though they were within reach.

This journey has only just begun and whether this has all been in one's head or whether it's footing has actually touched the quiet grassland, there could never be another journey quite like this - of one returning to one's motherland.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

To Compassionately Listen to One Another....

The tower of babble was created because of our lack of listening to one another and our not get along with each other. Hence the many languages we now have so that we would have to truly work at getting along. Which in the end meant taking the time to listen compassionately to one another.

Somewhere deep down we truly are all the same. We are simply looking for the same things in life, the meaning of life, the explanation of illnesses, the meaning of our place in society, the baggage we all carry from our families, from our relationships, why some of us are gay and not others, why we have so many choices in life to choose from, why whole wheat bread today and sourdough tomorrow, why eat meat only but no carbs, and then to eat carbs only and no meat, to which brand of toothpaste do I buy? ETC!

These things, simply stated by my simple way of thinking, is that we are to truly be looking out for and loving others before ourselves. In this "ME" society, it is all about the language. It is whether others are willing to communicate with me in the way that I feel good about, or encourages me or makes me look good or making me feel understood. BUT on the other hand, we really are suppose to be firmly looking out for others - for their needs, their comfort, their ability to be and feel understood.

We have so missed the point of living in this world. We are a bunch of selfish, cry babies, who when not getting one's way will cry out with outrage, words of unfairness, words of inequality, words of racism, words of MY rights, words of OUR freedom, words of your trees on MY property, ETC!

No wonder there are so many choices. I think god had a great sense of humor by creating choices. God wanted to just to see where we would end up on the selfish meter. MOST OF US FAILED! Myself included. Man, that's harsh but when we begin to look at the lives and situations of others, we can often return to our own lives and see the same mistakes, the same longings, the same questions that all of us have and in helping others, often times we are able to work out our own situations. If nothing else, simply having compassion for another should be enough.

We were meant to be living in community - TOGETHER - as one people regardless of color, gender, race, sexual orientation, and religious or political views.

Our division is simply by our own hand, our own bigotry, our own choice not to accept others for who and what they are.

We need to continue to learn how to listen, without self-inclusion, to one another for the sake of our kids, our country, our world.

War is not the answer. In the end there really is NO WINNER when it comes to the game of Life. It simply is whether we are willing to listen, love and or accept one another to the best that we can and being mindful of what life would be like if everyone were compassionately listening to one another.

Take the time NOW to get to know your neighbors, your coworkers, your extended family members, those who work in public jobs, etc. BEGIN NOW to think of OTHERS before yourself. What can you do for someone else? Then look to yourself and continue to work on those things you need to take care of.

Begin NOW listening to one another... We have a vast, global area in which to work on these things - from sea to shining sea.

"Be the change that you want to see" - Gandhi

Shalom,
Kim

Kim's Library...

NOTE: Most books can be found on Amazon
{except title with (*)}

CURENTLY READING:
Gandhi: An Autobiograpy: Gandhi
Jason Bourne Newest in series
As Nature Made Him - John Colapinto
A Fine Balance: Rohinton Mistry
Living Buddha, Living Christ: Thich Nhat Hanh
Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress: Dai Sijie
Colors of the Mountain: Da Chen
Wasted: Marya Hornbacher
Video: The Oregon Trail - to be watched


JUST RECENTLY FINISHED:
A Journey Through Mississippi - Tony Dunbar
Orphans of War - Rosemary Taylor*
Children of AIDS - Emma Guest
Black Death: AIDS in Africa - Susan Hunter
Mountains Beyond Mountains - Tracy Kidder
Snow in August - Peter Hamill
47th St. Black - Bayo Ojikutu
Acquainted with the Night - Paul Raeburn
To Africa with Spatula - Jane Lotter


LISTING OF BOOKS I DESIRE TO READ:
Lucky Child - Loung Ung
Incidents in the Life of a Slave Girl - Harriet Jacobs
My Bondage and My Freedom - Frederick Douglass
Coming of Age in Mississippi - Anne Moody
Geisha, A Life - Mineko Iwasaki
Island of Hope, Island of Tears - Brownstone, Franck & Brownstone
The Passing of the Night - General Robinson Risner
Waiting for Snow in Havana - Carlos Eire
The Sacred Willow - Duong Van Mai Elliot
Wanderings - Chaim Potok
Alicia: My Story - Alicia Appleman-Jurman
Let Us Now Praise Famous Men - Agee and Evans
Country of My Skull - Antjie Krog
Wild Swans:Lost Daughters - Karin Evans
When Heaven and Earth Traded Places - Le Hayslip
Faith and Betrayal - Sally Denton

Quote: dr. martin luther king, jr

"An individual has not started living until she can rise above the narrow confines of her individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity.
--Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Some Sites to Engage Yourself In:

Do Something - Get Involved!

AIDS/DEBT/AFRICA:
http://bolamoyo.com/
http://www.jubileeusa.org/
http://www.uua.org/uuawo/new/article.php?id=307
http://allafrica.com/malawi/
http://www.friendsofmalawi.org/
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/default.stm
http://www.nationmalawi.com/
http://www.afsc.org/africa/new-africa/default.htm
http://www.forusa.org/
http://www.africadaily.com/
http://www.aidshealth.org/
http://www.malawi.com/
http://www.un.org/
http://www.workingforchange.com/activism/action.cfm?itemid=18360
http://www.womenforwomen.org/DRCpop.html
http://www.womenforwomen.org/ProjectIndependence/index.htm
http://www.mercatus.org/socialchange/subcategory.php/41.html
http://www.alertnet.org/
http://peacecorpsonline.org/messages/messages/467/3375.html
http://www.hivportland.org/resources/infocus.html
http://www.pbs.org/wnet/africa/
http://www.usafricaonline.com/
http://www.farmafrica.org.uk/
http://twnafrica.org/
http://www.africawoman.net/
http://www.friendsofmalawi.org/
http://www.malawiproject.org/
http://lilongwe.usembassy.gov/
http://www.usaid.gov/locations/sub-saharan_africa/countries/malawi/
http://www.careinternational.org.uk/cares_work/where/malawi/
http://web.amnesty.org/web/ar2002.nsf/afr/malawi?Open
http://www.unicef.org/infobycountry/malawi.html
http://www.vso.org.uk/about/cprofiles/malawi.asp
http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/ican/C2152
http://www.inequality.org/farmer2.html
http://web.worldbank.org/

ViETNAM/ADOPTION/ADOPTEES:
http://van-online.org/
http://motherlandtour.com/
http://www.wingluke.org/
http://www.operationreunite.com/
http://www.sonyclassics.com/comingsoon.php?filmid=60&page=1
http://www.adoptvietnam.org/adoption/babylift-index.htm
http://www.geocities.com/vnwomensforum/index.html
http://www.acwp.org/
http://www.catalystfoundation.org/When_You_Were_Born_In_Vietnam.htm

SOCIAL ACTION GROUPS/MISC:
http://www.saveaslave.com/
http://www.freetheslaves.net/home.php
http://www.humantrafficking.com/humantrafficking/
http://www.iabolish.com/index.htm
http://www.trafficking.org.ph/
http://www.state.gov/g/tip/
http://www.idealist.org/en/ip/idealist/MyIdealist/Register/default?SID=e1f12fc0be5139054996eb5c49467cf3
http://www.gandhiinstitute.org/
http://www.historylearningsite.co.uk/mahatma_ghandi.htm
http://archives.obs-us.com/obs/english/books/Mandela/Mandela.html
http://www.oskarschindler.com/
http://www.shoah.dk/
http://nobelprize.org/
http://www.machers.com/Default.aspx?tabid=42
http://www.barclayagency.com/lamott.html

I Want to be Some One Great...

Who can heal the wounded at every moment of sorrow, to catch them as a safety for when the fall comes and the will to live, to move forward, to take the next step, to get back up, to the deep ache within, to the first drop of tear that has bound them unmoved.

Who can be there at death's door for those who have nobody to say goodbye to them. Nobody to tell them they were loved, wanted, desired, special, someone important, a friend, a sister, brother, daughter, son, grandson, grandfather, grandmother, aunt, uncle, cousin, or someone that some one met for just a brief moment and was struck by their very presence.

Who touches and caresses the faces, the bodies of the lepers of today - AIDS of whole families, AIDS of Africa, AIDS of India, AIDS of the underworld of slavery, AIDS of prostitution, AIDS of all colors, races, ethnic lines, gender lines, AIDS of infants, AIDS of grandparents, AIDS of health workers, AIDS of heterosexuals, AIDS of homosexuals, AIDS from every land, every continent, every nation, every tribe, every person who breathe the deadly disease of AIDS, and will take their last breath leaving some one behind to fend for themselves. I want to pick up and help and encourage those who are left behind. I want to make their lives better, healthier, and prosperous.

Who can take every child who lives in poverty, in abusive homes, in neglected homes, the filth of human waste, in the filth of neglect, in the struggling parents/family members striving to make a decent living at poverty level, in the filth of prostitution, in the filth of slavery, in the filth of a foster system that struggles to place these kids. Oh how I wish no child would ever know what it was like to be hungry, in want, in need, in filth, in an empty home while their parents have to work. Oh to be able to gather every one of these children and hold them, caress them, love on them and know that I have answers to all of their problems, that I would be able to save them from this wretched world we call home and provide the very things they need, in which no amount of money could ever buy.

Who looks beyond the monstrosity of today's world problems and is able to create, to begin a venture in which my life is viable not by my own living, but by working out of those things that anger me, that cause me to hate, to cry a river, to have another replace their lives for mine, to curl up with such a greatness of pain that it seems it will take my own life just by the very thought of other's difficult lives.

Though to be great doesn't mean having all the answers nor being able to solve all the problems, but being an idealist, it is my hope to never stop working toward something greater than myself.

I want to be some one great who does at least one thing that is important in life. In which it will make my life more worthwhile for living and knowing I didn't waste my time here on earth thinking only about myself.

I want to be some one great!